Friday! Friday! Friday!

We all agree Mondays suck, correct? Well they do. One of the worst things for me on a Monday morning is coming to work and having to do the "weekend update." I dread it. Mostly I dread it because it irritates the ever living shit out of me. Picture it. Melanie, sitting at her desk, sipping some sludge they call coffee, trying to catch up on my, um, work. Some random co-worker approaches with a "hey, how was your weekend?" In my head I start screaming things like "shut the fuck up" and "none of your efing business" and "get the hell out of my face." Out loud I say things like "oh, you know, never long enough" and "it was ok, low key." Mind you I could have discovered the cure for cancer or shagged Dave Matthews but I would still say something along those lines. I hate Monday mornings, actually I hate mornings period, but Mondays are the worst - except during bowling season when Thursday mornings are the worst. Why can't they just leave me alone?! WHY? I despise small talk for the sake of small talk.

Fast forward to Friday mornings. Random co-worker approaches Melanie who is sipping the coffee like substance minding her own business. Conversation goes "so, big plans this weekend?" In my head "yeah, big plan is for you to shut the hell up." Out loud "nope, gonna hang at home." Of course in reality I'll be jetting off to Paris for the weekend but I'm not telling these bizatches.